Thursday, October 23, 2008


I have for a long time now been quite confident a person. That was actually the first thing I had the determination to overcome.

But I have never really been content with myself. I can see lots and lots of problems with myself. I'm especially self-conscious about my body, which many will know I have never hesitated to use as a topic for self-deprecation. But the last month and a half I believe I have made a breakthrough in my life and myself.
I am now determined to get rid of my insecurity once and for all. And this has prompted a big change in lifestyle. Which at the moment I embrace fully and enjoy as well.

I have started reaping the results of my hard work and determination just lately.
I must say that I'm pleased with myself even though I'm still not content with the current situation.

This is giving me new hope as I can now say I'm not a hopeless lazy bum, but really a person who's able to steer his life in the "right" (better said wanted) direction.


Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Boom and I'm here

I have been pointed to an article on, which says blogs are dead... Well not dead, just not for me and you anymore. They are not as popular anymore.

I couldn't care less if my blog isn't popular. My main goal is not talking to the public. My goal is not setting public opinion. My goal is much more selfish than that:
I'm talking to myself.
Making my thoughts clearer by committing them to "something". I never liked writing thoughts in a notebook, it seems such a waste, I always seem to misplace the darn things, loose them. As such the thought is gone for now and forever.

Okay, so why should I even preserve my thoughts since half of them are plain daft? Because I choose to, and choice is the one thing I will let no-one take away from me.

So what am I thinking of at the moment?
How darn easy it would be to assassinate anyone. Period.
Any work done to make us afraid of doing anything radical is just scare-tactics. A smart person would be able to take the whole world down in a couple of fortnights, which is scary to say the least.

So you say: "But they would get you".
Yeah, right. And Santa is coming as well?
There is no way to hide all the evidence I hear my own inner voice say.
But there is!
It all comes down to how careful you are. Or even better, if you manage to hold a position with enough power that enables you to sweep it all under a convenient "rug". It all comes down to the thought, preparation and execution. And that has to be flawless. But I can't do it? Can I?
I could, but my choice is not to. Why? Cause I am a coward deep down in myself. And I'll agree to it. I'm not prepared to use violence against anyone since I do not want violence to be done to me.
Don't do unto others what you don't want done unto you. (or whatever that was).

This is becoming more and more like one of those rants I have been writing to myself, and why care? If you don't like it you can still go and read one of the big blogs out there that have "meaning".